Wednesday, September 12, 2012

God Don't Make Mistakes

Hi Everyone,

Hope you all are having a great night/day! I know I havent wrote in a while and alot has to do with I havent been able to figure out my emotions and feelings! It has been one heck of a whirlwind these few weeks. I have learned alot and still trying to figure this whole life thing out. But I can honestly tell you I still feel lost.. I guess living with depression and Spina Bifida is going to challenge me to where I havent been challenged before.. But I know I cant give up!

I know I have said that this summer had been a bummer and such. In many ways it has been but I wouldnt have changed it one bit. I learned so much this summer about myself and life. Heck, I gain two "sisters" this summer and got to reconnect with another or seeing my hero Jodi K. I realized its ok to let go of somethings that is holding you back. Also its ok to let go of people that bring you down!  Right now I want to tell you about the two "sisters" I gain this summer because they have changed my life so much and they probably don't realize it.  

I believe I have talked about Jenna Jones before but I cant get enough of the kindness of a person who once was a stranger. This young lady has changed my life so much I cant tell you enough. I knew of her in high school and always thought to myself that she would never be friends with a "freak" like me. I began this blog and then we became friends on Facebook. I didnt realize that she would become the best friend I really never had. The day she invited me to spend the day with her as a spa day changed my life. As a kid growing up, I hated going to friends house. I know alot had to do with me hiding my bathroom stuff from them. I thought that no one would understand and would make fun of me because in school some kids that found out were cruel. That day with Jenna was different though. She wanted to hang out. Since that day we have hung out a bunch more and I am not afraid of going out and having a great time. Also for me it is a big step towards be able to get my depression under control because I found someone that loved me for me and wanted to truly be my friend. Her drive and her belief in her dreams in so incredible too. She is such a talented person with so much potential. I will be a fan of hers for life! She is on her way though! I wish her the best of luck! I just pray we stay the best of friends because without her in my life I dont think I could fight my way!

Jamie Kline is the daughter of a very special friend and teacher of mine Ms.Vigus. Ms.Vigus said that we actually met when I was little at the school one day. I honestly dont remember that far back. . We had began talking on facebook a while ago and became friends. Jamie is a person I felt comfortable talking to. She is so sweet and kind. Once I learned that her and her family were going to be up here for a weekend. I wished on stars to be able to meet the woman that had became a great friend to me. Come to find out though that she was going to be here the same day my cousin was getting married. Well I decided right then and there I was going to see Jamie even if I missed the wedding. She had been there for me more than most of my dad's family anyhow. I knew that it wasn't going to go over good with the family but I didnt really care at that moment. So I went to the lake. Lets just say I made the right decision. I had so much fun on the lake with them all. They accepted me for me and not looked at me like a disabled girl. It was so amazing to get to experience that for the second time in a long time. I even got on a jet ski for the first time since my Grandma Rita had taken me on one as a kid. As we were going around the lake, I felt this sense of relief and calmness. It was like Grandma telling me it was ok to let others in my heart.  I realize now that its ok to do things that remind me of Grandma even though it might make me sad she isnt here. I am glad I have that memory of her. As the time went on, I really wanted to stay with them but knew I had to make an appearance at the reception. But that day I realized that its ok to do my own thing and what makes me happy! :)  I gain a whole new family that day but most important I found a new true friend/sister that I know will be there for me always! <3 u Jamie Kline!! I only wished I live closer so we could hang out more!

There are so many I think of as my "family" now including Jamie and Jenna. There is Mrs.Green, Ms.Coe, Mrs.Glomski, Mrs.Clayton, Keith Allen, Ms. Vigus, Jodi K just to name a few. I learned these people care about me and want me to succeed in whatever I choose to do. They help me when I need a kick in the butt, a ear to talk to, a helping hand, and a hug to comfort! I love each and every one of them so much! They each have changed my life in so many ways! With the help of my "family" I have hope in my heart. I know its going to be a long road ahead but I know each of them will be there for me when I need them! Whether I don't get to see them often or get to see them on a regular basis! They will forever be in my heart! 

There is a quote I found that someone posted on facebook today that made me think of my true friends! 

"When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice,solutions,or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares." ~Henri Nouwen

If you surround yourself with positive people and people who lift you up in life. You are the richest person in the world!!!  Thank you to the person reading this! <3 always, Dream Girl! 


  1. You just made me cry! Love you, sis!!! <3

  2. Love you, Jen. You are so much more than you realize. <3